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So nursing, the profession of our decade right now. I chose this because, to be frank, I don't have a good reason—I just did. I didn't have an epiphany one morning and know that this is what I wanted to do. I didn't make a pros and cons sheet and pick this because of what I liked about it. My mom is a nurse, my ex-stepmother was a nurse, my brother is now a nurse. Kind of made sense I guess. I did learn throughout my experiences, that this is what I want to do. It does interest me and helping people when they need help the most is something that I want to be apart of.
Now onto the juicy part, the actual school part—my failures, my wins, my friends. They say when you go to nursing school you will meet some of the best people in your life, and they, whoever "they" are, were right. No matter how crazy you feel, how stressed, how impossible it all seems those friends are just different than others. They get it. They get crying after clinical because you just had to literally wipe ass and it was awful but they helped you hold the cheek. They understand how hard you studied for a test because they studied with you. They get crying in your car before class because you are just so stressed there was nothing else to do but cry. We do everything together, from the beginning to the end we are in it all together.
Hence the title, you can see I am somewhat of a "failure" in my nursing school journey. I have failed the same class, TWICE, I am now on my third attempt and am just continuing to try my best. It happens, like I said nursing school is not pretty and it caught up with me tore me up and spit me back out. And I walked right back into the belly of the beast for my final shot and plan to slay the thing. I think more than anything I wanted to write about my failure because you don't hear a lot about them. You hear about the girl who passed every class with honors and aced every test, or the guy who no one thought would be a good PEDS is actually the best. I at least did not hear anyone talk of their failures unless it was whispered in a corner to their closest friend, like if it was said to loudly the universe would take that as an opportunity to screw it up.
So I'm writing this, I guess, to document what I hope to be my comeback. And for anyone else who needs to know that it is okay to fail, even fail more than once. We as nursing students are all so different, yet all the same with how much is thrown on our plate at once; and we are expected to eat all of it and dessert and not complain. So my plan is to write about my experience, write about my struggles, write about my wins, my friends, and my journey to be Nurse Lex.